Day 2

12/19/ Monday:
Hello everyone!  Well, we got up this morning around 8 and left for Stara Zagora around 8:45.  We picked up Plamena (translator) on the way out of Sofia.  We did have some snow as we drove to Stara Zagora....the mountains are beautiful!

We arrived in Stara Zagora around 11:30 and went straight to the orphanage.  I was very excited that they did let Dora Beth come with me...didn’t think they were going to allow her in the orphanage at all.  We met with the orphanage director, psychologist and social worker.  The orphanage is actually for children birth to 7 years, but they kept saying how M is special so they kept her longer.  We were also told there were around 180 children in this orphanage.  They did inform me that M has a very good friend who is just a year younger who we will be meeting.  They said that M and this boy have been friends for a very long time and it will be very difficult for him when M leaves.  They hope that by him meeting me that it will help ease his mind.  We finally got to meet M and spent about an hour with her in the early after noon.  They had told her that someone was coming to visit her, but they hadn’t told her who or what was happening.  So, she was a little confused by why there were so many people around.  She also had to ask what language we were speaking.  Although she has had some English, it hasn’t been as much as I had hoped.  During the first visit the psychologist (who M is very close to) told her that I would be adopting her.  She had a HUGE smile on her face when she was told she was being adopted.  We ended up leaving so that she could go back to school, but were told we could come back around 3:30 to visit her again.  We went to the hotel got settled and then ate some lunch.  We went back to the orphanage at 3:30...she was very happy to see us and our translator is doing a wonderful job at helping us communicate with each other.  I had brought her a few things during this visit and she was quick to show excitement.  She loves girly things....so hair items were a big hit.  She also likes my I-touch (no surprise there).  I tried to tell her about Iowa and things that I normally do.  She has never done so many things....never been to a zoo or field trip.  The psychologist said that she didn’t even realize that cherries come from a tree until she saw one and they explained what it was to her.  So many things to get to introduce to her!  She did ask if we took a plane or a boat to get here....I had to laugh at that, but said that a boat would take a lot longer.  She is very shy, but is doing more talking.  We will visit again tomorrow morning (we are working around her school schedule).  The one disappointment I had was that I was told that I’m not allowed to take any pictures while I’m at the orphanage.  I’m hoping by the end of the week they will either let me take a couple or maybe take one for me.  Now we are back at the hotel for the night....most likely will try to grab something to eat at some point.

Trip 1 to Bulgaria

I wrote updates on a google doc while I was in Bulgaria to share with close friends and co-workers while I was on my trip.  I am posting my updates and some pictures for you all to enjoy.

12/17-12/18 (Saturday and Sunday)
 Alright everyone, the trip has begun.  I left home on Saturday around 8 am and picked up my very good friend and traveling buddy, Dora Beth on the way.  We left O’Hare around 6pm on Saturday and got into Munich at 9:30am.  It was a very long flight and I hate to say I didn’t sleep well...didn’t even try.  We left Munich today around 1:30....we were delayed a bit due to snow.  The snow actually started to come down quite heavy as we were boarding.

The trip to Sofia (capitol city) was good, even with the delay and we both got a little sleeping in on that flight.  We got through all the customs and everything and were met by an agency staff member, Stephen....he will be our driver while we are here.  He is super nice and very interested in our politics and improving his English (which is 100 times better than my Bulgarian).  We are staying tonight in an apartment in Sofia and will leave tomorrow to go to Stara Zagora (which he claims is 2 ½ hours away....said he would be going 130km....sounds fast to me).  We also have had our first lost in translation moment...I guess we are the loud Americans.  The lady downstairs came up to let us know mostly through body language that we needed to be more quiet because they were trying to sleep downstairs.  Thank goodness for nonverbal communication!  We are going off to get some dinner.  Post more later with some pictures of this apartment...it is very nice.

bedroom at the apartment

2nd bedroom

bathroom...very purple!

Living room

Kitchen and dinning area....my friend Dora Beth

Ever have that feeling that things are just coming full circle?  I feel that way tonight.  Travel date is almost here and things are falling into place.  Tonight I got a call from a very good friend, Andrea, in fact she is the one who I called this summer when I was in the process of deciding about M.  The other friend who helped me back in June (feels like so long ago) is my traveling buddy, Dora Beth.  It was wonderful to talk with her.  She was very touched by a special package her kids got from their Iowa grandma (my mom).  She lost her mom over 5 years ago....she misses her so much and misses the grandma her kids don't have.  She shared this with me and I told my mom that I knew some kids who needed an adopted grandma.  Mom quickly came up with ideas for the 4 kids and got the package together and off to them.  Our conversation ended with a heart felt prayer for the trip, Dora Beth, M and myself.  After getting off the phone I realized what amazing friends I have...in many ways they are the sisters I never had.  I know that they will be wonderful aunties to M when she finally comes home. 

For those of you who are just starting your adoption journey or just reading for fun....I can honestly say that in many ways the friends I have met through this adoption journey in many ways feel like family too.  We have shared some of the same joys and heartbreaks.  We have waited and waited and waited.  We have emailed and shared frustrations and understood each others feelings, concerns and celebrated as progress was made.  I finally got to meet many of these friends over the summer at the Bulgarian Adoptee's Reunion.  I can't wait to go again this summer with M.  I hope and pray that she will enjoy it as much as I did.  By the way I have been celebrating that one of my first adoption friends, Rose, is finally united with her long waited for daughter.  Congrats to the new family, I can't wait for D and M to meet!
 
Things are finally going to happen.  I can honestly say I'm excited, nervous, and anxious all at the same time.  I'm about to turn M and my worlds upside down.  I know that it will be hard at times.  I know I will make mistakes.  I might even miss my days of being single .  But I also know this is what is suppose to happen.  I can't wait till I finally get to meet my girl...it has been a long hard process, but worth every tear shed, every doc that needed to be notarized and apostilized, and worth every day I have waited.  I hope and pray this feeling of peace stays with me throughout the trip!

Over the weekend

The count down is on....actually I am refusing to count down (it makes all my nerves and anxiety increase right now).  But that hasn't stopped everyone else from counting down for me, even though I've asked them not to tell me the number of days left.  All I can say is it is coming quickly and everyday I am more and more grateful that Dora Beth is going to be there with me!
So, with limited time left I have had a lot to do.  On Saturday I went to the Iowa City area to do some final shopping.  I started at the outlet mall, finished up my Christmas shopping (usually this is done prior to Thanksgiving, b/c I hate shopping after Thanksgiving....all I can say is people are nuts this time of year).  Got some really good deals which made me happy.  I even got a couple more outfits for my girl.  Then I went to the mall....did I mention I hate shopping this time of year?  I finished up the gift for the orphanage director (I was told that the director is a man).  I got to meet up with a great special education teacher I have worked with the past few years, who is now working in a different district.  She is truly an amazing teacher who is extremely accepting of all her students and never complains.....I never heard her complain once in two years even when kids were being naughty.  After lunch we went our separate ways.  I went and had a Build A Bear made for my girl with a voice recording of me saying "Mommy loves you".  Then off to Target to get a few things for the trip and donations for the orphanage.  Dora Beth has already bought 100 pairs of socks and between the two of us we probably have 100 pairs of gloves/mittens and hats too.  I think one of the best parts of shopping was in the check out line.  There was a little girl of 4 or 5 being held by her mom....she looked at all my mittens and told her mom "she has a lot of mittens"....perfect teaching opportunity!  I told the child that I was going to an orphanage in Europe and that the children in the orphanage didn't have hats and mittens and couldn't play outside with them.  So I thought it would be nice for them to have what they needed so they could play in the snow.  She agreed and as she and her mom moved up in their line I heard her ask her mom what an orphanage was. 
After all the shopping was done, I went to meet the Bulgarian couple I met a while ago.  It was great to see them and talk with them again.  They gave me so much helpful information about the country and even gave me a family member's phone number in case I needed anything while in Sofia.  They are quickly becoming such a blessing!  The sad part of the night was learning that Annie's mother had unexpectedly passed away and she had made a very quick trip back to Bulgaria to attend her mother's funeral.  I hope that she is able to get through next week and all her final papers and projects....and then to get some well earned relaxation!
Yesterday after church, I spent the day finishing up my girl's photo album.  I also cut out a few things on my Cricut for present tags and to put on the gifts for the orphanage caretakers and director.  I was then surprised in the evening with a call from a young woman I met this summer at the Bulgarian Adoptee's reunion.  She was adopted at an older age and has so much wisdom and a strong desire to give this wisdom to adoptive parents to help the new adoptees.  We must have talked for almost 2 hours and she confirmed many things that I have been told and have planned on doing with my girl when she comes home.
As for the done list:
gifts for caretakers
Christmas present wrapped
clothes for M washed
donations bought
photo album done
tickets bought

To do:
Finish arranging for pet care while I'm gone
clean the house
pack!!!!
work on my limited Bulgarian
get the quilt my mom is making for M
finish up things at work before leaving
get my oil changed
I'm sure there is more and I'm just forgetting it right now.....I know the time is going to go by very quickly and before I know it I will be on a plane about to change my life and M's life forever.   

Kid response

"Yeah!!!!!Finally an early Christmas present!"  This was my nephew Ethan's response when his mom told him that I finally got my travel dates.  Kids get it right so often!  The pure joy of a long waited for new cousin, niece and daughter.

Happy Thanksgiving

Ok, I know it is actually Friday and I'm a day late.  I was spending yesterday with my family, just enjoying time together and talking about what next year will be like when my girl is finally home and able to have her first Thanksgiving.  I hope that all of you in the US had a wonderful day with your families and that those who don't celebrate Thanksgiving had wonderful days too.

Well, I know I have been pretty quiet lately.  I must say that the last few weeks have been an emotional roller coaster.  On 10/31 I got my biometrics done early (this was fantastic since I wasn't suppose to get them done till 11/21).  On 11/7 my USCIS approval came in the mail and the next day I took my documents up to the State building and got everything notarized and apostilized.  Then off to FedEx to send things on their way.  So, all last week I was waiting to get the news that everything was a go.....it didn't happen.  Instead on Thursday I got an email titled "URGENT".  Now, this is NEVER a good sign.  Well, I found out that the agency in Bulgaria needed another document, notarized and apostilized.  How did I miss this document, you ask...well, my coordinator had actually asked the agency in country if they needed this document notarized and apositlized over the summer and was told no.  So, I figured that since they didn't need it then, I didn't need to do it now.  BIG mistake!  Last Friday after what seemed like the longest staff meeting at work, I took off for the State building again (this is about 2 hours away one way).  I got everything done and FedEx off to Bulgaria.  As soon as I got into my car, I hit an emotional wall, all the frustration that I had been feeling over the last few months just came out.  Thankfully no one was there to witness this.  I took the rest of the day and weekend to de-stress and rest.  All the stress made my head cold come back in full force so, I was very grateful that this was a short week at work and most likely nothing big would happen.  Tuesday night, as I was getting dinner ready, I got a call from my coordinator.  I wasn't sure what to think at this point....well, at long last I have travel dates.  It took a while for it to finally sink in, but it looks like I will get to go and meet my girl before Christmas.  I'm very excited about finally getting to meet my girl!  I have been looking at airfare over the past few days, so has my friend (Dora Beth) who is planning on traveling with me.

When I started on this journey I had planned on taking my dad with me on the first trip.  Over the past 6 months that has changed.  My dad started having some digestive health issues this past spring.  He hasn't been able to get it stabilized enough to travel far from home at this time.  Well, due to that I needed to find someone to go with me.  On one of my trips to Des Moines for paperwork, I was talking on my phone (yes, I know I shouldn't do this and that it's dangerous).  I had called to talk with my friend Dora Beth and was explaining this situation to her.  Being the amazing friend that she is, she responded "I think I can make that work".  I didn't even have to ask her to go, she was willing to go with me and deal with all the emotions I will be going through meeting my daughter for the first time.  The best part is that she understands it, because she too is a mother to a child adopted internationally.  So, the two of us, who have known each other for 22 year, lived together for 1 year in college and have remained friends through good and bad times, are planning on traveling together in the near future on my journey to motherhood.  Trust me she is an amazing friend to have, when I was feeling really down last weekend she sent me a surprise on Sunday to lift my spirits.

Flowers from my friend

I will keep you all updated on what is going on.

Adoption Awareness Month

November is National Adoption Awareness Month!  A fellow adoptive mom, Valerie,  is posting about it daily on her blog.  Go check it out http://fromthetrenchesofadoption.blogspot.com/  I am donating a super cut pair of mittens to Valerie's give away.  Here is a pic of my contribution.

Yes, for those of you Twilight fans who are thinking these look familiar.  They are inspired by the mittens that Bela wears in the first movie.  If you want to win these....check out Valerie's blog and find out how.

As for my adoption process.....well, I finally got my biometric appointment date for 11/21.  I wasn't very happy about it being so far off.  So, I decided to go up the afternoon of Halloween to beg them to do the biometrics early.  And they did!  I also had to call my USCIS officer in charge of my case to let her know that I had them done early and needed my approval as soon as possible.  She asked me to call her back on Thursday, when I was told that my file was in the "to be approved today" stack.  So, I am expecting to have my updated approval in my hands sometime next week.  I know I will have to take some more time off to get all the docs apostilized asap!  I am praying that I will have all my updated docs on the way to Bulgaria by the end of next week.