Adoption update

Things have been quiet.  With adoption there seem to be two phases....hurry and get everything done and then wait.  We have been doing a lot of waiting.  Waiting for dossier to be submitted, waiting for the referral, waiting for travel dates.  While we have waited I celebrated another birthday, Maria has gained more skills in basketball and made HUGE progress with walking.  Then this week.....feeling a little blue that the month was going to pass before anything was known.  It happened....things started to move in the adoption.  It never ceases to amazing me how an adoption can go from standing still to warp speed and the looks and statements of confusion of those who don't understand the process.  

I'm not going to lie....the thought of traveling with Maria to Europe makes me nervous.  Navigating airports and security with people who do not understand her medical issues and most likely will not take the time to listen or care makes me very anxious.  My biggest concerns are the airports and security here and not in Europe.  I know that probably sounds really funny, but my experience is that European countries on a whole are much more accomendation to those who have disabilities in the airport settings at least.  I'm also worried about taking Maria to a country that is not use to seeing children or adults with visible disabilities in public....we are not going to get the friendly smiles or helpful people there like we do here.  We have already run into some issues with hotels.....but with all that is worrisome to me, I know it will work out.  We will make it work out together as a family.  It might not always be easy and I suspect there will be tears along the journey, but we are also both very excited about the journey to finally meet little sister.

My heart....

Today I waited after work for Maria....she was participating in her first basketball practice at school.  I had just met with the vice principal and Athletic Director (AD).  We discussed what participation for Maria would look like.....I won't lie, it was hard.....not because the school is against it, they are very open to making it work.....more because of what it means.  Yes, Maria can participate in practices, but not games.  Yes, Maria will learn basketball skills and team work skills, but it isn't quite the same as what her peers will experience.  Honestly, it is a huge step for the school, for other kids like Maria.....but it also points out once again the differences between her and her peers.  Once again I grieve for the things Maria will not experience.  

  On the way home, after a long day....Maria recounted every moment of basketball practice.  I told her she wouldn't be allowed to play in games, but that she can attend games to cheer her teammates and friends on.  She was disappointed, but I also told her this was a huge step and the goal is for her to improve her skills so she can play with the adult wheelchair basketball team during the summer.  She was satisfied, even though I have mixed feelings about it.  I'm thrilled she is being included as much as she is, I wish she could play basketball with her friends in games and represent her school.  For now we have much to celebrate, but still more work to be done.

Christmas and New Years

We had a nice almost 2 weeks off.  It was really nice to just relax ad spend time together.  We spent Christmas Eve and day with my parents.  My brother and his kids came by too.  Christmas Day, Maria accidentally told my grandparents and aunt about little sister.  We hadn't said anything because my mom asked me not to....it is officially out.  Can't say everyone is excited about it, but it isn't their choice.  I'm sure once little sister is home they will change their minds.  Maria felt horrible that she accidentally told and even worse that extended family isn't being overly supportive.  In the end, it came out, they know and we are moving on.  Here are a few pictures from Christmas.

Adoption update

Today I sent off the final documents to my agency.  They will hopefully they will be sent to little sister's country to be translated on Friday.  I'm hoping that everything will be translated and ready to be registered shortly after the new year.  Which should mean that we could be traveling in late January or early February to meet little sister.  

Slowly I have been picking up little things here and there for little sister.  I have a few outfits to take her based on what I expect her size to be (I'm hoping she has grown some since the report was written).  I am also finding a few toys to take along for her to explore.  I'm getting more and more excited about going over to meet her.  I cannot wait to see what her little personality is like.

Specialists

When you have a child with a special need, there are always specialist to be seen.  Today was a long day at the university hospital.  I have to say the specialist Maria sees are some of the best.  Today included an MRI (gotta admit I always dread those, ever since I got the devestating news last February about Maria's spine).  Then we went to visit with the neurosurgeon...the nice one with good people skills.....he asked us several questions, took a look at Maria's back, made sure we knew what to look for with a shunt malfunction and then gave us the news.....we don't have to see him for a whole year!  Gotta admit this made me want to celebrate.  I did talk to him a little bit about little sister's condition and wanting him to see her when she comes home.  He was very agreeable and explained more about little sister's condition.  Then we headed up to check in at the pediatric specialty clinic, just letting them know we were there.  We then went to get an ultrasound of Maria's kidneys and bladder, followed by a urodynamics test being done.  Then back to the specialty clinic to see Maria's urologist.  Again we answered several questions and talked about where Maria was.  Maria has a low pressure point in her bladder and weak muscles that control her bladder.....this is actually a good thing for her, it means that her kidneys should stay healthy, it is highly unlikely that urine from her bladder would go back into her kidneys (which does happen with some kids who have SB).  He is happy with how she is doing and we don't have to see him for a whole year too!  So great news today and we celebrated with Maria's favorite.....ice cream.

Maria's friends left behind

It is hard to believe this day is finally here.  Today in Bulgaria, Maria's friends (referred to as J and S), traveled from Stara Zagora to Sofia to appear in court.  They are now part of an amazing family.  They are loved sons and brothers.  Waiting to be reunited with their friend/sister, waiting to hug their mom and dad, waiting to be embraced by their siblings.  

Today was a good day.  This week I have thought a lot about J and S, about their mom and about Z who decided to remain in Bulgaria.  I have also thought of the differences between my current adoption and adopting Maria.  Maria's adoption was hard in many ways....it was emotionally draining.  I was at a point where I just wanted to be a mom, just wanted her in my arms.  This time I'm busy being a mom.  I don't have as much time to focus on how hard the wait is or what isn't happening as timely as I want.  Currently I'm waiting for my last three documents to be apostilled and returned to me.  Then they will be sent to Little Sister's country to be translated and registered.  I'm hoping that I will have a referral in early January, but with adoption nothing is for sure.

Thanksgiving

We had a nice long weekend spending time with family.  It was nice just playing card games, talking and enjoying family time.  Cannot wait till there is one more child at the table to be thankful for.