Reality

Another adoption blogger wrote a post about her realizations regarding international adopt, specifically about adopting from Bulgaria.  She is completely correct about the frustrations that waiting families face.  It also made me realize that it is important to be upfront and honest about the process with other families.  It isn't all sunshine and roses.  I know my friend Viviane is always trying to let families new to the process understand the wait, the process and the children who are being referred needs.  At times people just don't want to hear or accept what she is saying.  No matter if you plan on adopting a child with special needs or "healthy", the child is still going to have needs due to the circumstances that they have lived with in their short lives.  Medical-social homes and orphanages do try to provide children with the basics, but there are things they cannot provide to children to the degree that children need.  They just don't have the time, the staff, money or the ability to create a family type environment in these facilities.  We also know that there are some orphanages that don't compare to our worst nightmares.  Thus being said, the child will have issues that waiting families might not of planned for or expected.

Where I'm at right now....about 2 weeks ago I got an email from my agency saying that the BG agency thought that I might have court on April 9th and that they needed 3 documents notarized, apostatized and sent to BG now, since the potential court date was on Monday.  Well, I rushed around the next day and got everything together, notarized, apostatized and FedEx to the agency in BG (by the way if you haven't had the pleasure of sending things directly to BG yet it cost around $120 for a FedEx envelope).  I was told by FedEx that it should be there Monday before 6pm.  I also, per my US agency, scanned copies of the documents to them and they were forwarded to the BG agency so that they could have things translated and ready to go. 
Honestly, at this point I knew the documents were going to be there on time and I was HIGHLY frustrated that I was given very short notice of the need for these documents.  I had 2 business days to get these done and sent over and they still didn't get to the agency until 5pm that Monday night.  So, I knew that court wasn't going to happen that day.  The question was, when will my court date be.  Last week on Tuesday I got word on my court date.  Needless to say I was NOT happy at all.  My court is not until May.  I have only shared the specific date with a few people right now.  So many people are so supportive of my adopting M and are anxiously awaiting word on when I can go back and get her.  They mean well, but at times the questions about news and what is going on aren't easy on me.  They just reinforce the frustration and anger that I feel.  Yes, I feel anger.....I do not feel that it should have taken as long as it did to get a court date or that the court date should be so far out.  I am angry about the way things seem to happen at the very last moment and I am expected to drop everything to get it done.  Both agencies I am working with have done many adoptions in Bulgaria, they know what will be needed for court and could have easily let me know what was needed with more notice. 
Mostly I'm angry about what this means for M.  She is 11, she understands the process to a degree.  She has seen many friends go through the same process and is anxiously waiting for me to return for her.  In December she asked me when I would return for her.  I told her I hoped to return in April or May.....now I don't know that May will be possible.  It could be easily close to 6 months between visits!  I have no idea what this extra wait will do to M.....I have emailed her agency director letting him know what is going on and have requested that the psychologist talk with M about the potential for the wait for my return being longer.  Due to this I don't see how we will be going to the Bulgarian Adoptee's Reunion this summer, which also saddens me.  It was wonderful connecting with all the other families last year and I was excited for M to get to meet other kids who have been adopted from Bulgaria.  I was hopeful that M would get to reconnect with a friend from her orphanage that was adopted by Valerie at the reunion.  Although, Valerie and I plan on getting the girls together as soon as possible to re connect.  We are both very excited to see that reunion. 
I just keep thinking about M, waiting............... 

Bleach Pen T-shirts

Hello, my name is Katherine and I'm addicted to Pinterest!

Latest thing I have tried from Pinterest is bleach pen t-shirts.  It is fairly easy to do.  So, here is what you need:
Colored T-shirt
Contact paper
Design (or free hand if you are a great artist)
Clorox bleach pen
paintbrush
and something to put between the T-shirt layers

Ok, so how I started was to find and cute a design and cut it out with my Cricut.  When looking at designs I tried to think of what parted I wanted to be bleached tried to have as few extra pieces of contact paper to place on the tee.  I then transferred the design onto contact paper and cut it out (the Cricut didn't seem to want to cut the contact paper well).  Once the design is cut out I placed the contact paper on the t-shirt and made sure that the edges were firmly down.  Then add the bleach and let it sit for 15-20 minutes and then wash the bleach out.

First attempt: learned that bleach looses it's power if it's too old...this didn't even fade the t-shirt at all!

2nd attempt: learned that this is way TOO much bleach!

Results of 2nd attempt....not perfect, but my niece liked it.

3rd attempt: used a paint brush to apply a light layer of the bleach pen to this tee, better results.

2 more tees for my niece...the "Once upon a Time" was a pain to cut out, but it turned out cute.

Tees I made for M....hopefully she will like them.

Crafting weekend

This weekend has been a nice change of pace.  I got to spend most of the weekend doing different crafts.  Yesterday my mom, 6 year old niece (Rhiannon aka Sass) and I went to Hobby Lobby for a craft supply run.  These always turn out way more expensive than they should.  Anyway, we went back to my parents' house and started on the first craft project.....double strand lace or ribbon headbands (thank you pinterest).  Rhiannon loved doing this and decided that these are "princess" headbands.  These are super easy to make and we ended up making 12.  2 for Rhiannon, 2 for M, 2 for my other niece Scarlett, 4 for my coordinator's girls and 2 for me. 

Rhiannon showing off the top view of her "princess" headband

Some of the headbands we made

Me modeling one of my headbands....my hair usually isn't that curly by the way.

Then today I made Easter treat bags for some special kids I know in the Chicago area and some in Indiana (again another idea from pinterest).  I must admit I'm not sure what I did before I had my Cricut....it just makes life so much easier.

I made 10 treat bags today

Filled with goodies....now just to get 2 boxes and get them sent off to the kids.

March ups and downs

I don't know about the rest of you, but it has just been beautiful here.  Warm temps in the 70's and even 80's....gentle spring rains and a few thunderstorms.  The grass is green and flowers are blooming.  I love the colors of spring and the different flowers that bloom this time of year.  It has been a beautiful March outside.  I know that my paperwork made it to the MOJ the beginning of the month and I continue to wait for word that a court date had been set.  I have continued to prepare for M and have even sent her pictures of her room to help her prepare.

This month has also been very difficult....

Waiting for news about the adoption process is HARD....almost painful at times.  Unfortunately I have also had other issues come up in my life....which is one of the reasons I have been more quiet.  Just over 2 weeks ago things turned upside down....my college friend sent me an message late one night...a message that didn't sound like her normal.  I was rather worried and in the back of my mind, I feared the worst....the next day that fear was confirmed, her cancer is back.  This time instead of being in her breast it is in her bones.  Not only that but the next day she was going into surgery to fix the 2 fractures in her spine that were caused by the cancer and putting her in extreme pain.  She made it through the surgery well, only to be told that her bones were softer than expected.  In the following days we also learned that the cancer is throughout her bones and will be a life long battle, no treatment will completely kill this cancer and the approach the doctors are taking just doesn't feel like enough.....Needless to say this was a big blow.  I know that that my friends will seek out the best help and course of treatment (alternative or traditional) they can find, but it is very scary and sad to think about a 33 year old wife/mom/friend being in the battle of her life.  It is heartbreaking realizing that her husband and son might have to live without her sooner than they should have to.  At the same time I am amazed at her positive approach to this, even though I know she is scared and worried about her little boy growing up without his mommy.  Currently she is undergoing radiation...which does help her feel better.  Please pray for my friend and her family....I want her to have many happy years and memories with her family and friends, but I know it isn't in my hands...I have no control over the situation.
Needless to say this has been a very hard month.........

A girl who needs a home

My friend Viviane is trying to help "B" find her forever family.  "B" lives in Eastern Europe and needs a family.  She is a beautiful girl with lots of potential.  Check out Viviane's blog and some pictures of "B".  Let's help "B" find her family!

http://martiniadoptionroad.blogspot.com/2012/03/meet-b.html

M's room

Today my mom came over with the desk and mattress for M's room.  I had been storing them at my parent's home while I painted and we just waited for a nice weekend.  I wanted to do it last weekend, but then we had snow on Friday, so we put it off till this weekend.

The boys enjoying the bed....I love the headboard!

Libby was checking out the new pillows

Just chillin on the M's bed

Had to shut the cats out of the room to get a picture without them on the bed.  Every time I would move one off a different one jumped up on it!

Pink, Pink, and more Pink!!!!

The desk I found for M...love it, it's hand made out of walnut, just beautiful!

Dresser in it's new place

closet full of clothes

M asked for Barbies, so here is what is waiting for her.  I took a picture of it because she hasn't seen one yet.

Yes, they invaded the room again!

They are all looking at the camera...that never happens!

In some ways the last month quickly flew by, in other ways it feels like it dragged on and on.  I have been waiting to hear about my Article 5 letter most of the month of February.  I did find out that the Bulgarian agency was going to have the interview at the US Embassy on Tuesday in order to get my Article 5 letter.  Still waiting to hear that they got it and that it is being translated. 

This time of waiting has been difficult.  I know that M is waiting anxiously for me to come back for her.  This wait is different for older children.  They understand that their new parents are coming back for them.  They have seen this happen with friends who have been adopted.  So, they wait....wondering which day their family will come to get them.  One of the questions that M asked on our last day together was, when would I come back for her.  I told her I hoped it would be in April or May.  I am still holding out hope and praying that it works for me to get her in May.  Although, if I could I would leave today to get her...heck I would go just to see her right now!  But I can't and so I'm stuck waiting, preparing things for her and missing her like crazy.  Here are a few things that I have recently gotten for M's room.  I just love the color the walls turned out...it looks great with the bright pink accessories that are in the room.

M's headboard that came this week

A bear one of the teachers I work with made for M.....not sure what is going on with my camera, might have to think about getting a new one sometime soon